Gathering thoughts…
A world of little thoughts.
I do not want to be dependent on the arbitrariness of others. I do not want to do something just because another person has decided for me that I should do it. I want autonomy and freedom. I notice that I have developed a real allergy to authority in recent years.
There was a two hour period between the time I got to office and had my first cup of coffee where nothing happened. The coffee machine hadn't been setup for the day yet. Two inoperable hours of walking to the office kitchen every 15 mins or so, hoping I would see the glow of the LEDs in the miniature display box. Such…
As a positive person, I still have a strong Eeyore characteristic. I have doubts. You seldom hear me express this side of my personality. Acting positive and confident follows the belief that you should act like you want to be. So I appear to have a positive outlook. Which, of course, I do have, except for when I…
i hate how much i loved your laugh. i hate how lonely all of this growth feels. i hate that you never celebrated my hard work. i hate that i tried. i hate that i loved your car. i hate that i loved every bit of that part of you that made me hate myself. i hate that i stayed. i hate that i waited while your mouth…
i just discovered some poems i wrote a few years ago they are so good (remember how i said "people who can't write, write poetry"? lol i'm changing my tune now that i see myself as a fucking POET) Poetry is to bouldering as prose is to sport climbing: A great poet has the skills for prose, the only question is…
My organization held a usability conference for teams in Bangalore. The goal was to push our engineers to be more UX-minded, equip them with knowledge and resources, and provide an opportunity to practice. The sentiment that all of the leadership conveyed was that we are at an inflection point in our org and product.…
Lately, I have been listening to podcasts again after I'd been abstinent for almost a year. Right now, that's helping me with two things: 1. Healthy dosing of news Over the last couple of years, I had ran into the trap of news on social media. That included on only doomscrolling the news feed itself while not actually…
What is a model for radical honesty, and how can we communicate it in a way that others understand both our actions and their role in them? Consider a quadrant with "benefit to self" and "benefit to others" as its cornerstones. The opposite side consists of losses to oneself and others. Examining this model, what…
Walk around. And conceive the best things Because really; it wouldn’t make sense if you try to think “you’re special”. The fact is probably you’re not - it takes hard work to build confidence and real talent/effort into doing certain things well. It wouldn’t makes sense if there are 2000 years of mankind history And…
This is not an essay. Rather, a letter to self. I have been journaling for almost 3 months now. It's irregular at best. Yet, it has been the best clarity building exercise for me. During the writing process, I discovered - patterns in my thought process. Such as - I start, seldom finish. I am an instant-dopamine…
Something of vanilla, bourbon, and lingering notes of all the versions of you that lived in this cloth. Yesterday, I thought it was over. I'm not quite sure what happened, I must have been too consumed with all of you that I felt within the coat that I didn't even notice the button, second from the top, loosen between…
Ich hasse die Moderne Kunst. ("I Hate Modern Art") Ullstein, Frankfurt 1960. John Anthony Thwaites. Die Suche nach einem Buch, das in einem der Mai und Juni Wasserschwälle durch die Deckenleuchten (die Lichtstärke verstellbar - wie war die Freude groß!) auf Bücher, Bett und Boden, und meine darauffolgende radikaler…
Look at our movies, they are full of blood and violence. Look at the combat sports we enjoy, the crowd goes berserk when there's blood or if someone gets knocked out. These serve as an outlet for our suppressed violent selves. I think this ties back with the way humans became apex predators, our ancestors were…
Wednesday 29th January. 18 games on one evening. An accumulator-builder's dream. This is a gluttony of football. One show promising to serve up this grotesque buffet of deep-fried dopamine hits. "We go live to the San Siro" "There's been an equaliser for City" "Big chance for Benfica" This is football reduced to its…
I try to begin each day with a clear mind by avoiding my phone, the internet, and anything else that could be a distraction. Sleeping through the night acts as a reset, clearing out the mental clutter that accumulated during the previous day. I strive to maintain this clarity and keep my mind as noise-free as possible…
Hj eu queimei a largada na hora de dormir e agora são 00:32 e estou acordada. Fui trabalhar, cheguei em casa, li um pouco e levei as doguinhas para passear. Depois a amg operada pediu pra eu buscar umas coisas pra ela na farmácia. Acabou que não tinha o curativo que ela precisava, só em loja de materiais cirúrgicos.…
The graver division in society is not between those who support one side of an ideological position, but between levels of devotion and objectivity to the ideological position. Between LOYALISTS and LEANERS. The loyalists find no wrong in their positions, and those who subscribe to them. If there's any fact, any line…
A Vanessa, uma das minhas melhores amigas, completava 9 meses de gravidez enquanto eu fazia as malas para viajar para São Paulo. "Segura o Dante, eu estou chegando", avisei já ansiosa para conhecer o bebê. Fui visitá-los tão logo cheguei ao Brasil, no entanto o Dante continuava tranquilão no útero da mãe sem denotar…
Today marks the end of my three-month study abroad in Cambridge. It's been a wonderful journey, filled with profound learning, unforgettable experiences, and a deep affection for the city. Initially, the thought of this chapter closing is saddening, and it's natural to feel this way. Transience often conjures feelings…
A very quick digital collage. I like playing with collage but I don't know if they're any good. Though how can you go wrong? I might pick this one up again and play with it further. Maybe I can just store these here.
300 words sits above the atomic essay "limit" 1. repost ship30 essays === this place encourages publishing (people will see it) yet hides the vanity metrics (likes) whether strangers stumble upon or known friends come to learn 2. sandbox for quick thoughts benefit of getting writing out of head bonus if you get…
não me mande não experimentar alguma coisa porque a sua realidade com aquilo foi ruim. eu gosto de provar. gosto de sentir. gosto de eu mesma pensar em avançar ou recuar. é certo que não preciso morrer pra ver deus, mas se eu achar que preciso morrer, me deixa. depois eu volto e conto como foi. quero provar e sentir.…
There are chaos in my head. An ocean's worth of storms inside a skull. Contradicting ideas and thoughts fighting each other like storms in the seas. However, there is no victor. Intrusive thoughts making me question my own thoughts and self. This goes to anyone who can relate with me. You, I see you. I hope we will…
I stan'd about BlockFi for years. Yesterday, the FTX contagion was realized and withdrawals were frozen. I stand to lose $50,000 USD in Stablecoins, my ACH withdrawal is in a "Pending" state. I spoke to my wife and let her know. This money represents many hours of my life, sleepless nights, hard work, and time away…
He came to see me, Even if I forgot. He was the inspiration, Behind every lovely shot. He always sat there, Fulfilled and lone. Beholding me gracefully, He jollied and shone. I remember spending nights, Thinking of him on my roof. I crave this gorgeous- He lives aloof. I ask the ones whom he met, Is he the same he…
We often look to this quote with fondness and admiration. We often use this quote to inspire and motivate. For a new skill. For a promotion. For a healthier lifestyle. Yet we are often baffled and surprised when we see the other side of the same coin. The ugliness of how negative small changes can add up too. For…
Life is fragile. A single event, decision, fight, health issue or any other reason can cause one's life to end, and the same goes for the rest of us. We never know what another people are really going through; social media doesn’t tell the whole story, and we can’t predict what will happen to us. So, let's be kind to…
I went to see Batman. The one in which Rob uses a ton of eyeliner. Enter Screen 4: The gender ratio is messed up, not a surprise. During the intermission, I got to know, not very far away there is a place where the gender ratio is much more messed up. Screen 5, The BTS Concert Live Streaming. Now, how did I feel to…
Do you ever have one of those moments when the storm clouds part, clarity strikes and for a split second, you are able to join the dots? It happened to me yesterday reading an excellent long form piece by John Kolko on Abductive Reasoning. (http://www.jonkolko.com/writingAbductiveThinking.php) No, I hadn't heard of it…
It’s a common excuse. I don’t have time. If you want it bad enough, you make time. That’s the way I felt when I started my 30-day experiment on journaling gratitude. Now I have a full-blown journaling habit. I'm really grateful for it. You can build a journaling habit. It doesn’t take that much time. Here was my…
To look back at this year, I need to go back further, starting with 2007. I have a tainted memory of a late night wrestling with my thoughts, I seem to remember thinking to myself that I was insulated from the worlds problems because I live in the UK. A few months later, I witnessed a global financial meltdown and the…
https://youtu.be/fhDVVfELsM?si=1Cc6Bb8KnMDZCyx dude what if we reincarnate over and over listening to the same songs in different styles.
the problem with creative writing is that it messes with your "serious" writing. when you're in creative mode, you can do whatever you want. there are no rules. you can get away with a hand-wavy explanation of something under the guise of being an artist or whatever. it's not that creative writing doesn't have well…
Wanneer ik lees, blijven mijn ogen steevast hangen in de witruimte van de rechterzijde van het blad. Wat zou er gebeuren als de tekst geen kader had? Op welk punt zouden mijn gedachten fragmenteren wanneer de tekst horizontaal door zou lopen tot aan het laatste woord?
Why do you always “huh” and assume what people say. Don’t do that Focus on what people say to the 100% and - actually ask & listen very very carefully. Even if you’re doing anything or not doing anything. Don’t become lifeless and mindless zombie Just have own thought and critical thinking - think clearly before…
I want you to know I mean the things I say. But how can you When the things I say Are the things I am expected to say Whether I mean them or not?
I was told as a kid that I was good at writing. That identity, “writer”, formed quietly in the background, and stayed there, since it never seemed worth much. But I’ve assumed the identity of “editor” in plenty of circumstances - usually unasked for, unnecessary, and annoying. I’m ready to stop tearing down and start…
Olha. Ainda estou internada. E assim, não sai da minha cabeça o funk puta rica, puta mexicana. Eu não consigo parar de cantar isso e já está me irritando, apesar de engraçado. Não é uma música que eu ouço, mas tava no Twitter e apareceu um cara cujo nome é Xurrasquinho (daí você vê kkkkk) dançando ela. Desde então,…
One of my guiding principles for inner work is “let everything be”. If you feel angry, let yourself feel angry. If you feel sad, let yourself feel sad. If you feel bored, let yourself feel bored. It’s the resistance to these feelings that causes problems. Or in buddhist terminology, this resistance is tanha: a wish…
Focus is overrated. There, I said it. We’re told to zero in, eliminate distractions, and optimize every second. “Deep work” or whatever the latest productivity cult is preaching. But constant focus? It’s not a superpower. It’s a CAGE. Your best ideas don’t show up when you’re grinding away, when you're trying to force…
The chain of habits are too light to be felt until they are too heavy to be broken. Write your journal. K talking to you - but you putting yourself in a position where you are not ready to reply is your fault. Not trying to take away any credit or be harsh to myself Though it’s always better to be asking stupid…
To be synthetic is to recognize redundant patterns in information. Familiarity arises when these patterns align with what we already know, while differences emerge when they don’t. Synthesis is about compressing this new information into a rule or simplified understanding, a process that is inherently personal. What…
Excuse the generic title, I am programmed to type those words first on all social media- Orkut, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, Google plus, etc. For me, internet in the late 2000's was about discovering humour blogs. We used to have those neighbourhood newspapers complete with satirical takes on our everyday lives. A…
In the morning the weather was rainy-pouring, actually. For a moment ı wouldnt be able to go to the library but luckily it cleared up later. Now,I gonna use my english. I am learning english, there for I am going to the library. sometimes, I am reading book there and there is a free tea and yummy cake (thank you…
Moms article came in the paper today. We had such a nice and sweet time with all of us in Ammamma’s room as atta read out the article to us. The dogs were there, everyone was so happy, it was just really sweet. We were actually woken up by a phone call from moms friend congratulating her. I realised it’s a big deal…
A new visual announcement has been piped in to the lounge at my corporate day job, proudly announcing that our CEO was recently crowned "1 most influential" by some self-proclaimed arbiter of the game. Besides immediately striking me as a dick-waving power move, I wondered why they chose to emphasize influence as a…
My friend Rahul and I recently exchanged messages praising the 1977 Fleetwood Mac album Rumours, particularly Lindsey Buckingham's gorgeous guitar in Never Going Back Again. Which reminded me of how I started building my CD collection. It was 1989 and I'd just arrived in New York as a student with no cash to spare. I…
Who decides what the truth is? In liberal mythology, various factions and individuals are constantly making arguments and propositional claims about what is true. This dynamic "marketplace of ideas" is presented as the powerful engine that has propelled liberal democratic societies to global dominance. This myth turns…
