mirrors - that's how birds are

to my little birdie who i lost a year ago.
you left me like breath leaves a body. no goodbyes.

i remember the day i found you. i remember how i told you to stay and fight. i told you, "just keep breathing".

you held on for 5 days. i remember the first day when i woke up and opened the shoe box home that we built for you, your mouth open - crying to be fed.

you were alive.

the cells within you, made of countless atoms were alive. sorcery. a sorcery of the universe. breath.

so we fed you. you used to reply to my soft whistles.

i thought you were growing.

you had a world to see birdie. oceans, islands, tress that would become rest stops. you had to taste the sweetness of existence.

we fed you milk. we fed cottage cheese. oh the way you ate. oh that grace of aliveness. hunger. the true measure of life.

i was so afraid to pick you up. now when i look back maybe i saw myself in you.

you and me are not that different birdie. life greeted you with a storm as it has done to me. so when you gave up i didn't know how long i could fight.

so i cried and cried and cried but you didn't hear me.

is it better there? is there love?

it was supposed to be you and me. do you remember that? do you remember watching me work while you sat next to me?

maybe the Gods created us so they could pity on something. pity on them, for we invented love. ptiy on them for we look fear in the face and choose to stand.

our ephemeral existence does not scare us, it makes us believe.