Pressure to enjoy

As we grow older, we experience the pressure to enjoy ourselves. Unlike family, peer, or societal pressure, this one stems from the self-realisation of new preferences.

For the longest time, you didn't have preferences.

Specifically in India, the activities you'll indulge in are decided for you. You enjoy those activities because you're supposed to. No one seems bothered about your opinion.

When we experience more of life, we learn about the different activities people engage in.

As a child, I noticed that every family had vacation preferences.
While vacation for many meant going to their village, it also meant visiting a new place within the country. Some children traveled to different countries while some didn't travel.

The pattern and variety of activities hardly differ. Like in the case of traveling, some tightly-knit families engage in too many household rituals and traditional activities.

Quite a few families have a preference for how often they eat outside and even the type of cuisine they'll eat. Once when out eating with friends, I learned that some people don't order dal-rice at a restaurant. The logic for that was it isn't a dish one should pay to eat.

In spite of feeling estranged by that logic, I added it to a list of things we Indians don't question.

I understand that traveling, being traditional, and restaurant outings are preferences families arrive at based on financial standing.

But some of these preferences, compulsions rather, impact how we view enjoyment. We are either too reliant on others or too closed off.

And I feel the middle ground is to continue with childhood preferences that don't feel heavy and spend time exploring activities you enjoy without feeling hollow.

We tend to feel hollow and alienated when we perform the enjoyment. Enjoyment shouldn't be pressurised.