reading with a motive.

my eyes hurt from reading all night, my mind having grown imperceptibly rich, lacking focus.

i think so little about my own life now, because of how much i involve myself in other people's business/thoughts

TO BE HONEST.
i think 76% of the rationale for reading is "I need to read if I want to write"

and why do i want to write? BECAUSE I WAS WRITING ALREADY!

but i felt like i wasn't good at the kind of writing you show people

but NOW, i feel like, reading so much, i have probably gotten better in some ways but maybe...maybe i'm losing my mind?

i feel i barely think now

is that good?

i think that's pretty bad for writing.