my favorite drugs
music -- sometimes music can be punishing ("public" music...the kind you can't shut off at will) but music is a blessing when i'm doing boat work. i've found that the only type of boat work i can really do and the kind that i sort of enjoy is the kind that requires merely the possession of my body, and that leaves my spirit free to focus elsewhere. yesterday i sang as i cleaned the boat and i felt as though i was having fun. yes, i was having fun! the music anesthetized me with sweet buzzy sensations, the joy of which was too great to contain in the act of listening alone, and so i sang for about 1-2 hours as i cleaned the deck until i had cycled through all my recent favorites and became music-fatigued. (i used to experience music-fatigue often when i played the piano daily...one reaches a point of music saturation where one cannot tolerate even one more second of music; i'm learning to save the limited musical minutes of my day for the work that must be done, and to not spend a single musical minute on any frivolous activities...]
books -- a girl told me she had a nose spray addiction. she couldn't leave the house without her nose spray. she had to buy reserve nose sprays so she would always have one around. that's me with my kindle. if ever i am stuck in an unpleasant moment of boredom, i zap myself out and away to a more stimulating world...on the other hand, when i am overstimulated or anxious, books have the opposite effect of calming and soothing me. reading is a panacea which adapts to my needs