I want to be your therapist

Empathy.

Extremely important in the care industry.

“You know you’re not being empathetic enough if the person in front of you ain’t crying” - I have always heard.

As part of my day job, I am not supposed to be anyone’s therapist, but I end up needing to demonstrate empathy. When I was younger, I stuck to canned phrases (“that sounds hard”). As I matured, I actually started to genuinely feel people’s pain and now have visceral reactions.

With enough of these expressions, people started opening up to me. After some point, I would always need the Kleenex box within arm’s length.

And when people did break down, with their nasal secretions everywhere, bearing their soul to me, I would be at a loss of what to say next.

Do I transition to your childhood? Do I focus on your strengths? I wish I had some structure in these vulnerable moments. I wish I could help you see how temporary this all is. I wish I could help you with a breakthrough.

Despite my desires, more often than not, I offer nothing. I keep empathizing until the sobbing is controlled. Until the apologizing stops. Until the person leaves and can smile goodbye to the staff.

I end my day exhausted. When I’m asked how it was, I typically reply: empathetic enough.