The genuine heart of cringe

Trungpa has always really spoken to me. All the themes he touches on are salient to my life — fear and bravery, sadness, loving-kindness, self-hatred.

He takes things I believe myself to be good at (being soft, sad, sensitive, honest, open) and says these are what you need to cultivate in order to be free of fear and confusion. I've always been a fearful and doubt-filled person, so this is something I'm really seeking, and he's kind of saying I'd be good at it, which makes me want to try. I get frustrated easily if I start out bad at something. Not an ideal way of being, but there we are. And obviously, trying to be brave creates a lot of opportunity for virtuous cycles to emerge.

There was a gif —https://www.reddit.com/r/Damnthatsinteresting/comments/y2cdw5/rally_drivers_disposable_helmet_screens/
— I saw the other day of a dirt race driver getting splattered over and over and just peeling a layer off his visor every time. That's what I'm trying to do here.

Every time I feel that intense humiliation feeling that I struggle with, instead of physically cringing (ie trying to redirect the feeling from my mind to my body) and basically going 'lalala I can't hear you', I look directly at the layer I'm trying to cover myself with and just open back up. What would it look like if I leaned into this feeling, I ask. Usually, what I find when I do that is... nothing at all. I don't feel a thing underneath all that 'beating of one's breast' as the Buddha would call it. Weird, no?