Disappointment
Such a stupid word, really. Disappointment. According to Oxford, "sadness or displeasure caused by the nonfulfillment of one's hopes or expectations."
While I've never enjoyed the spotlight during recognition of accomplishments, even birthdays, I learned pretty recently how greatly disappointed I feel when my significant days are ignored.
Yesterday was Mother's Day. I had a What's App from my oldest son early in the morning:
"Happy Mother’s Day Mom!! Love and miss you, I hope you have a great day.
From my middle son, a GIF that said "Happy Mother's Day" - animated mother shoving her daughter's face down into a piece of cake. I asked him if that is how he remembered me:
"Lol what? No😆
I just thought it was funny
Love you mom"
Nothing from my youngest son.
If you are a woman, you understand where my heart landed yesterday.
My 65th Birthday was in November of 2021. No cards. No gifts. Not even from my husband. Barely a Happy Birthday.
We moved to a remote Caribbean island in April of 2021. There is no postal service. It takes some creativity and thinking in advance to send a card or a gift, but it can be done.
My husband has no excuse. He lives right here with me. He has money. He has a truck. It would have cost him very little to find a small present to celebrate a 65th Birthday. Or to take me out for a meal. Or plan a surprise excursion. Or give me a card. Or ask our neighbor to make our dinner or to make a birthday cake.
So.
If I just read this piece, in your shoes, I would be shaking my head, wondering what kind of horrible wife and mother and person I must be.
I know I sure am.